5cense Where our dream life (2016 – 2020) catches up to The Daily Noose + how we became anon I'm us


[8 April 2020> It was around this time last year (actually, exactly a year ago today in Baltimore) that we started transcribing our dream log here. This is the final set, from 2016 to the present. Sum of these we may have already logged here, and there might be some we logged on 5cense.com that we didn't log here.]

Jan 5, 2016 – DC
I was doing some sort of tech field work in the bay area, driving around in a rental car. Jess met me there + we went hiking up this hill. Someone had a radio and said a missile was launched. We saw it streak across the sky. Then this bubbly cloud formed over Berkeley + it mushroomed into the classic nuclear bomb shape. Jess said “I can’t believe they just bombed Berkeley!” Then another mushroom cloud formed over Oakland, and they were sprouting all around us like sped up mushrooms. A biker dude on a Harley with his face painted like a skull rode by + said we were all dead. We felt fine tho. Jess panicked what to do + i said let’s just enjoy these last moments + hike up the hill. If it’s worse higher up, then fine, at least we’d go quicker.
     Then we were traveling in a group in Germany. We went thru customs and i was singled out for a random health inspection. As we rode on the train the guy (this old crusty German guy) told me to face forward and grab the rail, that he needed to check my testicles. He put on a latex glove and felt around, then told me to put my pants back up. When i saw our tour guide (who was German) i asked whether he thought that was inappropriate, that of all the health checks he just happened to want to feel my testicles. He just shrugged and didn’t want to talk about it. Jess was really hungry and the pizza we got went bad so fast she didn’t get a slice.

Jan 18, 2016 – DC
I was in college, sort of like UC Santa Cruz, and was dating a girl sort of like Jess but from that time, she kept distorting everything i said, literally mixing up the words coming out of my mouth, we were in a trial period so figured it obviously wasn’t going to work out. I saw Miranda Mellis and @ the same time saw some guy that had the same interests professionally so i introduced them, but neither seemed enthused or grateful, like they didn’t understand me. I realized that all words are binary, that they also have their opposite meaning embedded like spin up/spin down or right/eft states (even each letter had such states) + as u compose sentences @ each word the sentence branched off depending on the context/spin state of the word b4 it in an expanding series, like even in the above dream, “Jess” stood for girlfriend, not the real 1 + in that universe that alt-Jess didn’t work out, never happened, also explains why we never really dream about real places.
     Then @ some sort of sporting event i guess basketball but all these cheer squad types of things going on, they were throwing towels into the audience + i got one + it was dirty, realized they take the used towels they used to mop up the floor and give them away. Obnoxious fat girls in front of me were trying to show me something, shoving it in my face, but i couldn’t read it. I went to grab my glasses and had all these sunglasses with the price tag labels still attached that i accidentally grabbed from the store but meant to give back.

Jan 20, 2016 – DC
Jess had some student coming thru town staying with us (tho seems we lived on the west coast), this spoiled cocky trustafarian kid that looked + acted like James Franco. He was traveling the world with some hot foreign chick and they were driving thru where we lived. We went somewhere in his car and it had this ridiculous steering wheel, like one of those cholo small chain 1s, but really high up + that swiveled around all over the place, at times he almost hit me in the face with it (i was sitting shotgun).

Jan 21, 2016 – DC
We all lived in this sort of boarding house, felt very institutional, in some foreign country. Then they told us we all needed to leave, but i didn’t feel ready too. I tried to convince some others it would be easy to stay + hide in a far-off storage room (it was this vast compound that seemed mostly vacant and all sorts of places to hide). We had nowhere else to go + they wouldn’t even notice if we stayed longer + they weren’t asking us to leave for lack of resources, seemed unnecessary. We were all packing up our stuff ready to make our move to hide, to become squatters. But i was worried that having my backpack wd give me away.
     Then Josh Cohen was a rock climber, he wasn’t even that good but was at a climbing gym acting hot shit + teaching classes. He asked if i cd do a 5.13 + i said probably so he told me to, and i said i didn’t need to prove it + that i didn’t climb in climbing gyms. «Then why are you here?» he asked + i said i didn’t know so i left. I found this 5.13 climb up on a mountain + was simulating the moves. It was on flat + the climb totally contrives. I was having to contort my body in all these weird convoluted positions. It was more like a traversing bouldering problem then a climb. Then there was a window + the route went up a man-made wall. I checked the guidebook + sure enough this was the place. In a photo in the guidebook there were all these people, students + beginners + gear everywhere. It was on top of a mountain but there were buildings built into the rock that was where people climbed.
      I needed to go to the bathroom but i was in India + didn’t want to offend anyone peeing in public (which it was cuz there was hardly a “natural” spot). After walking around a while i finally found a bathroom, you had to wait in line until they let you thru these convoluted gates, kind of like the 1s to exit subways, but controlled by some operator. I saw a gate open so ducked into a holding area, ends up it was to let someone out, but another gate open to let him out + stepped out just as the gate was shutting on me + barely made it. I didn’t mean to sneak in, but didn’t understand how all this worked + seemed unnecessarily complicated. Then i was inside this big bathroom complex + more people standing in lines, but they were taking shits + I just needed to pee. It all seemed absurd, a lot of trouble just to pee. Finally i found some weird urinals. They were all makeshift, each different, and these kids wd have to remove this dish every time + put in another, full of blue liquid that smelled like curry + seemed like food. They dumped the used dishes into this gutter where this untouchable w/ leprosy wd shovel it thru w/ his bare hands. The kids of course asked for money, 25 rupees, so i dug around in my pockets trying to piece together the right combination of change from these huge plastic coins w/ weird markings on them. While i did this, somebody stepped in front of me + used the urinal being prepared for me. So i paid for the next + started @ the leper + thought about untouchables + how fucked the caste system was, but he seemed happy + i didn’t want to be judgmental. Also thinking about how stupid + unsanitary this whole «bathroom» was but didn’t want to say anything + judge their culture, as the attendants all seemed absorbed in the ritual of it. As i spaced out staring at the untouchable someone went in front of me again then someone i know called over to me + told me they were leaving town the next day + that we should get together. They said they got accepted to some prestigious university, i forget the name of. They showed me the acceptance letter + it was hand-scribbled on ruled paper like a children’s drawing. I just nodded as i didn’t want to question or judge + ruin the moment for him. Plus i just wanted to take a piss. I went back worried i wd have to pay again but they recognized me + said next 1 was mine that they were preparing w/ this weird curry-smelling stew. One kid ran out of something + left + another took the dish he was preparing + went into a stall to presumably use it himself. There was a civilian (Indian) standing around + i shrugged my shoulders + shook my head at the absurdity of it. «I’ve been waiting here 15 minutes just to take a piss, and now he goes + the urinal he prepares for me he uses for himself?» The man agreed + said it was crazy, but was sort of just numb to it. I said i was just going to pee on the wall + he said he would too if he was me, that i deserved to. I ranted on loud enough so the kid cd hear me, that i paid for this + had been waiting + how absurd it was, for just a simple natural thing? And then i went + peed on this weird hanky fiberglass wall (which of course woke me up so i cd go pee for real).

Jan 22, 2016 – DC
I was an economist studying the street supply chain, which i observed through a hole. It got to the point that marijuana was cheaper than, say, sex so that vendors were using joints as add-ons, like "buy a blowjob + get a free joint."

Jan 26, 2016 – DC
First we rented a car but all they had was a tour bus. We needed to park it overnight at this apartment in an underground garage, we tried to park along this curb, but we went up on the curb + the bus tipped over. But we could easily tip it back upright + it turned into this tiny little car, one of those 3-wheel motorcycle car like things. Then we were driving it up this remote road in Mexico. We were on assignment to do a story on this diving area, I had an assistant that sometimes was Jess. We passed these sketchy looking guys hanging out w/ shirts off + tattoos staring at us. Then we passed a whorehouse + all the women were vamped out like gothic vixens. We got to the end of the road up in this small little roundabout + we told them what we were there for, i had parked a few inches from the curb + she told me to get it closer. I was about to start it back up but realized it was lite enough i could just lift it by hand. It was getting to be late afternoon + i wanted to dive before it got dark so grabbed our masks + flippers + went strait down to this weird dock-thing. The whole thing felt like some sort of amusement park. We were waiting to pay before we could go + these 2 women w/ headsets on were taking forever even tho we were the only 1s there besides some friends they were talking to. 1 of them asked for our «zip» card + we handed her a card + she used it to dip into a plate of beans + sour cream. We said that was a good use of our card + we were serious but she thought we were being facetious + said if we logged as many calls a day as she did u wd too. She showed us a clipboard of her call log. But she still wouldn’t swipe the card, she just sat there like she was waiting for a phone call.

Feb 1, 2016 – DC
Left a cocktail party or something at some mansion + Lawrence H was giving us a ride home. Jess got out to open gate + he started driving off, said he’d pick her up at the top of the driveway which was really long + winding. Lawrence started to space out + run off the road then did a U-turn without knowing it like he didn’t know where he was going. I asked if he wanted me to drive, but dint want to be too forceful since he was Jess’s boss. but it was like he kept falling asleep or was drunk + he ran off the shoulder + then over the embankment + we were air-bound, tumbling, and i was thinking so this is it. This is what the final moments are like. Then the tumbling + spinning stopped + we were okay. I got out, still precariously on the side of a hill. A voice told me that Lawrence did this as a trick to shake me off his tail. He was nowhere around. I was in the ruins of some compound (that i think was in a previous dream), walking around, so was thinking i couldn’t be dreaming. I stumbled into this smelter room like a big mill, blue-collar guys (seemed like Italy) i acted like i belonged but was stumbling, thinking if i was dreaming it wasn’t very restful so then i started flying, hovering inside the building til i got thru a window then rose up high above the landscape + knew i was dreaming + it was a rush, felt restful. I was thinking about what the ability to fly did for the psyche, to be so instantly mobile, thinking about seagulls and birds, and realized the feeling wd be short-lived. My shoe was dangling so i leaned down to slip it back on over my heel, then my other 1, it was like i was on a trapeze + was hanging by knees upside down + couldn’t get back upright + felt uncomfortable so i figured it wd be better to just fall so i started falling but fast like in freefall + it was scary so i smoothed it out, over these sand dunes near the beach (that also felt like a location of a previous dream, with big waves) then in some hotel bar ordered a beer + got 1 + ½, other guys talking about sports, guy is all like, yeah, i got that text too, yeah, i read that tweet too, like all their thoughts were talking points gleaned from social media.

Feb 8, 2016 – DC
I was training for a race, by crawling + scampering through this convoluted cross-country course, then since the event was televised i hoped they would catch me flying. Then in some podunk country store, had 5 minutes to get to a soccer game 5 miles away. I went on uber, which all the hicks had never seen. Surprised a car was “0 minutes” away, so went out and there was a sheriff’s truck, he asked if i ordered the Uber and i said yeah, then this cop comes at me to beat me up. I yelled into the store for Scottie, who came out + started beating the shit out of the cops like a super-hero.
     Then i pulled into some place where 4 rivers converged, water everywhere covered by these giant mills. I asked directions and this guy was showing me around the mills + asked me if i wanted a job. All these 4 rivers converged there, and this mill was responsible for pumping the water to 4 different cities. He showed me stacks of wheelbarrows made out of firewood that were used to collect firewood. My job would be to keep the water from freezing (by burning the wood) and allocating it in the right proportions to the 4 cities. He took me into this room will all these mill-workers, blue-collar guys wearing all these weird masks. He gave me this mask that looked sort of like a snout-nosed pig. I didn’t even have a place to stay.
     The magic # was 5 + by allocating this space, meant to write in the space that it was taken, effectively occupying the space.

Feb 16, 2016 – DC
We were riding a chairlift up sum jagged granite mounded (like the Matterhorn) + it got struck by lightning. We dint feel nutting but observers from a distance said they saw a lightning bolt penetrate cracks in the mounden + go deep into the earth. They also said (over sum sorta loudspeaker) that the chairlift had the “largest ground” in the whorld + we wanted to know what “largest” grnd ment but there was no 1 to aks sints they told us over an intercom but we assumed largest meant she cd withstand th highest voltage. Panic ensued cuz every1 assumed terrorism + then we were @ a metro station + J had a newborn dog/monkey (earlier we babysat a dog that turned into a monkey + the owners abandoned it so we ended up w/ her) that she fretted over + we told her not to fret cuz this chair had the largest ground + she asked what that meant so we told her w/ authority so she wouldn’t worry while trying to swaddle the baby monkey in this blanket but it cried + wanted to get back in J’s arms.

Feb 18, 2016 – DC
I ate 4 sea urchins + then was curious wether we had pests so i laid the empty shells out on the floor. Right away one that i put near the edge of an armchair started wiggling backwards. I retreated back to this couch to stay quiet and watch. Earlier it was someone else’s apartment, a big spacious modern apartment that we thought could be cool, but it had all this bright blue + bright green vinyl furniture. But J + i tried to imagine what we would do with it. Now it seemed like a mix between this apartment and the first one we had in NYC on E 89th. I was watching the urchins trying to stay awake, not only was the 1 at the base of the chair still wiggling under, but a backpack on the chair was also moving as if something was inside it. then J came home + I told her about how i was using the urchins as bait to see if we had pests and how one moved and she asked what i was going to do, but i hadn’t thought that far ahead, whether i would catch the critter + how + we started to worry cuz we didn’t want to capture or confront the critter, just observe it and know it was there. Then i looked up at the wall, what was a square wall with a window, was now a rounded wall with no windows. I asked J if she saw it, and said we must be dreaming cuz the wall can’t just change like that, and that we both must be in the same dream, this was proof! We went down to get the super + explained to him what had happened + how the wall had changed, and he said that’s why they say trigonometry means «the devils work». We got back up to our apartment and some other people were there and they had cooked breakfast + were picking at some leftover pieces of sausage in a cast-iron skillet, and i asked if they saved any for me. It was my own house + they didn’t even serve me a plate.

Feb 24, 2016 – DC
We were riding a motorcycle sumwhere in Africa when this lioness comes charging right @ us + we freaked + lost control + fell over but the lioness ran right by hunting sumthing else + then later we watch'd these seagulls on a rock where sum chickins roostid. The male seagull spent a lot of time gaining the trust of the chickins + glided up inches away + startid cooing to a fat baby chick who look'd mesmarized + then th female seagull slow slow went in there + all gentle picked up the chick + flew off + dropped it sumwhere else but dint eat the chick, not even intrested.

Mar 1, 2016 – DC [the 3rd 1 appeared in episode 12 of Textiloma]
We were diving, looking for lobsters mostly but just an excuse and diving in this indoor tank in an aquarium that was connected to the ocean + sometimes we’d venture out to the ocean but not as interesting nor as many lobsters, and lets face it we liked to show off in front of the people watching.
     Then we were coordinating movers even tho we were only staying at this big modern house for only 3 days. We thought we’d make it easier on them by putting everything in kitchen cupboards. There were a series of screen doors the movers had to get thru that were really annoying and we told them they could just prop them open but they were being really polite. They were waiting for the foreman, who was late cuz he was making a reservation for the restaurant up the road. So to kill time we walked along some square-shaped canal.
     Then we were in the ocean cove, was gonna put a knick-knack we had on the rock while we swam, then figured it might get swept away if a big wave came. We asked a local and they didn’t know the high-water line, so we thought to experiment for ourself. Then we looked in the distance and there was a massive 100-ft wave. We got out of the water and went up the cliff to watch it, but it never seemed to get closer or just slowly dissipated. Kevin was there making a totem pole, but it was just like 1 i already had, that i had bought there, so we asked them to make another copy. It was half-bear, half-bird (w/ a long neck) and had the virgin of Guadalupe painted on the entire breast. Kevin though it was really cool.

Mar 7, 2016 – DC
I went back to work for Donna P in some nondescript job-job, my first day i went to get coffee and a pastry in the hip company cafeteria and paid $12 and waited around forever couldn’t figure out why it would take so long, then the cafe workers went into a meeting, an hour or so went by, of course i was late for work. When the workers came back they still didn’t have my coffee and pastry and didn’t believe me that i had paid for it. I went to Donna’s office which was some corrugated tin hut w/ a dirt floor up on a mountain. I told her i quit before i even began, and told her the story about not getting my coffee and how i didn’t have the patience for it and that it seemed a bad sign of incompetence + that also the commute was really far like 50 miles + i didn’t have a car. She just sat there not saying anything. A storm was a blowing, hurricane force winds pelting rain against our faces. I asked her reaction + she just asked why i had applied to begin with, like what did i expect. I said i thought things might be different + this digressed more into a conversation of the “monoculture” office environment, how nothing had changed how “monotone” + boring it was. I left but had to go thru this assembly line w/ my bike, where i had to park and lock it up + then pick it up somewhere else. All these other zombie-like people were in line + we had to pass over this piece of plywood w/ a sensor under it that activated a camera to take our photos to identify our spot in line.

May 2, 2016 – DC
Leaving for some place in SE Asia. I had all these small bags + people were handing me things like ½-eaten sandwiches or piles of just sandwich meat. I got all snippy, and this old lady said "I was just offering to give you something." I was trying to gather my stuff and get organized as to what was essential as we were in the immigrations line, that was really long, but it was going as fast as you could walk + people were scrambling to get around me. These agents were blocking the line and letting it go in chunks, so people wd start running. Quickly got up to the front and it was some sort of automated visa-on-arrival thing. There were dozens of open machines, no reason there needed to even be a line. I tried some, but they were shut off or the screens were frozen in various states of disrepair. This one guy @ a pinball machine said he could help me, that he'd rigged the pinball machine to process the visas. So i gave him my stuff and he fiddled around w/ wires, not even a keyboard. But when he was done he realized he mis-spelled my name so i had to do it over again. I was annoyed, but couldn't say anything since he was just trying to help. So i just said i would do it on the regular machines, of which plenty were still open even tho there were all these people in line. But each machine i tried had some sort of issue w/ it.

May 16, 2016 – DC
Standing @ an x-section waiting for a light, watching a line of tire repair places... one dilapitated shack next to me in particulr. 3 guys acting like a pit crew @ th Indy 500 on the balls of their feet waiting for a flat tire to fix, signaled when a car drove thru a puddle in front of them. a light changed + no cars came + we waited 1 more light to see what happend. The U.S. was in recession. The next lite changed + again they wait'd again all eager to work. The intersection cleared + they rifled thru the muddy puddles looking for a tire to fix to no avail. Sumhow the elder crewchief knew @ 7 am + 2 pm light changes + no customers, that statistickly they couldn't maintain economickly + 1 of the younger workers knew it too, like that scene in The Godftather (where Deniro gets laid off) + w/o a word the younger apprentice started taking off his gear + putting away his tools. Stoickly shook the crewchief's hand + then walked away tward me + we cd see only then did he start crying quietly to himself + this made us cry... not sure what fueled all this, maybe the San Antonio Spurs + how even when they win ppl (fueled by the media) care more about th dramatic antics of th whiney losers vying for attn, or maybe inspired by the mexican busser @ a restaurant the other night, quietly doing his job so well no 1 even notices.

Feb 7, 2017 – Georgetown [appeared in episode 12 of Textiloma]
In the bay area, looked—7:32 + realized i was supposed to pick up J @ 7:30, said quick goodbye to David + Kevin, not a big deal since we lived in the same hood now, cd see each other more often, didn’t even say goodbye to mom. Rental car was in valet lot, guys running like crazy all over, but still, i could see my car like 100 feet away + could have easily gone to get it, but took valets like half an hour to get it + i had to go wait in some line. They didn’t have the car i wanted so instead i got a dilapidated Chinese vegetable truck, i didn’t have time to argue + thought Jess might find it kind of funny. No windows so it was cold on the freeway, not that we were moving fast since it was bumper to bumper traffic. By this time the Chinese vegetable truck had morphed into an old Mexican bus w/ all sorts of swag hanging from roof + windshield + the word Jalisco. I had 2-3 other guys with me that needed a ride, and they were going south towards San Jose, but i needed to go north towards Redwood City (so i guess i must’ve been in Los Gatos).. could i just drop them off at train station? They said they would come with me + it seemed like a good idea, but then how would they get home after? I needed the bus to take Jess wherever we were going.

Aug 6, 2017 – Georgetown
I was sitting on the ground writing on a piece of paper + 2 people who later i realized were sort of agents/investigators started grilling me about what i was writing + i said nothing, just crazy nonsense. I showed them + it was a long list of summations, calculated out by hand. They asked what it meant + why + i said i just liked to calculate out infinite series for something to do, cuz they had no end to them + went on forever. They grilled me how i was able to make money doing this, to live like i do + i told them my wife was a professor, but they still grilled me, wanted to know how much she made etc. how we were able to afford etc..
     Then it was like i was part of this investigative team + we were in a boat on the ocean. Every so often something would bump the boat + they would yell shark! + flip the boat over on purpose to hide under it, which baffled me. So the third time this happened i asked if anyone bothered to open their eyes underwater. I opened my eyes + what we had bumped into looked like a dead shark. I started swimming into the open ocean. My colleagues started coming after me, i looked back + there was a bunch of whales headed right for them, but the whales all had big comical grins on their faces. Then it was like i was in this underwater world, a self-contained crater, there were all these animals but they were like miniature comical versions of animals, + they were all happy and goofing around. Tigers and apes sliding down this mountainside, elephants + giraffes. I just sat their mesmerized, watching. I realized it was a museum exhibit called “Miru”. My investigative colleagues had moved on so i was on my own.

Aug 16, 2017 – Georgetown
Woke up last night cuz i felt something big under the bed pushing up on the mattress. I looked under w/ a light + screamed when i saw this street urchin kid, but the kid was all mellow + didn’t scream. After recovering, i asked “didn’t i scare you?” + s/he sorta shrugged. The kid was sort of androgynous + of undetermined ethnicity. Each time we looked at her, s/he looked different, sometimes ½ black, other times Mexican or Indian, usually darker skinned, sometimes more boy-like other times more girl-like. But always quiet, but confident. I asked how s/he got in + s/he just said s/he wanted to sleep somewhere for one night where she felt safe. So i let her stay, then started to go back to sleep.
     Then i looked back under there and said my wife was out of town + s/he said “i know”, then i backpedaled + said, “no, i didn’t mean it like that, what i meant is that there’s room on her side of the bed.” But then w/ them lying next to me i couldn’t sleep, thinking about what society would think if they found her sleeping in my bed. I prepared answers in my head, “it was like fucking goldilocks, i came home + just found her sleeping in my bed.”
     I didn’t say anything out loud, but it was like s/he could read my mind, she said she had a “home” she could go to, but they wouldn’t even notice s/he was gone. Then it was like i was there walking into the janky orphanage, a cinder-block inner-city dormitory, w/ all sorts of illicit activity going on in the lobby. But i wasn’t there, so it was like a memory s/he implanted. I knew i was being conned, that when i felt asleep s/he wd probably rob me. But i didn’t care. And i didn’t wanted to interrogate her about what happened, where her parents were. But it eventually came out it her father died (at least to her her) and her mother gave her up when s/he was 3 or 4. I felt like i was helping her by talking to her, having her talk about it, but knew deep down as did s/he that she was the one helping me, that i was the one fucked up for living a “normal” life. Then it was like we were at Granini Nannys house and although she was only like 10, she said s/he knew everybody in the area, cuz this is where s/he grew up. S/he didn’t meet them directly, but remembered her mother talking about them, and she started to reel off names and Granny Nanny was oh yes, so + so was this, + that, so it was like her references were validated. Tho still felt she could’ve made all this stuff up (but again, i didn’t care if so).
     Most things i said, s/he said “i know,” like s/he knew the answer to everything. Very streetwise. S/he asked what i did for a living + i said that i figured s/he wd know the answer to that + s/he said i do, i just wanted to hear u say it + want to help out with what u do. So i said i was a writer + that i doubted she could help, besides running errands like making copies or getting coffee. S/he asked what i was working on + even tho s/he knew the answer i told her, that at the moment i was struggling with this piece called “Textilioma” + explained how it’s what happens when a doctor leaves behind a surgical instrument, usually a sponge, in a patient after an operation + how my last book ended w/ a story about my father being embedded inside my brother + got an operation to remove him + now i felt like i needed to surgically embed my brother (w/ my father embedded within him) inside me, or at least come up w/ a metaphor for this. S/he acted like this was a no-brainer, the only solution was to actually have the procedure done, that’s the only way you can write about it. Then i explained how i had a fear of doctors and surgeries, would rather die before getting cut open and operating on. That even a blood transfusion (my brother’s blood into my body) wouldn’t work because i was afraid of needles. So s/he said s/he do it, no problema. I said that would be a huge pain in the ass and s/he said “you have no idea, this ain't nothing compared with the shit i have to deal with on a daily basis.” Again, it was like her helping my problems was helping her + vice-versa. But before this a mutual trust needed to be formed, and boundaries needed to set, and of course when i said this, s/he said “I know”.
     The subject of adoption came up + s/he was like u don’t want to go down that road, they’re gonna make it next to impossible for you. It’s so much easier under the radar. So s/he became my guinea pig, actually doing the things that i wrote about, so i could lie more effectively. I never asked her name, but seemed too much time had passed to ask it now. I figured it would come up. I said that i would call her Chaulky White in my story, tho, i added my reluctance, might be weird calling you Chaulky if you’re not white. Then kind of looked at her like, right? What are you anyways? She said she didn’t know, her mother was sort of mulatto. But remembered speaking spanish a lot. Then she said there has been a black Chaulky White empire in Boardwalk Empire, but explained how this didn’t happen until 2010 and my brother died in 1997, so we couldn’t make references like this. She said Boardwalk Empire took place during prohibition era, well before my brother died, so this made it okay. But i explained to her that it only mattered when the series was released, people would discover flaws in continuity and not believe the story. "Then how bout calling me by my dog-given name, anon I'm us."

the above entry was pivotal for starting Textiloma, the actual dream where we transferred authorship over to anon I'm us (not just for Textiloma, but also here (before this we were Rem+Rom or whatever pseudonym we were using))

Rome — 8/2/2018
I was swimming along w/ this group of young women that had rafts of gold bullion cubes that seemed precarious, about to tip. Then i noticed it wasn’t gold, but pyrite + they were dropping the cubes down to fellow divers below. They were from disparate places + ethnicities, almost like this was a team-building exercise, but also a social hour. I swam under to see how the pyrite was floating, the “divers” below were experience no-gravity situations, jumping around + dancing. Then we were inside an airplane, in a padded compartment for experiencing no gravity. The pilot apologized that we’d have to take our seats since we were landing + there was heavy traffic. Once back at the airport I was waiting for another plane, they weren’t announcing anything, you kind of just had to look at people’s baggage claim tickets going thru security. I went outside + saw 2 iguanas, one was bright red because she was a pregnant female. They weren’t really afraid of me. I threw them a lizard tail, still twitching, but she wouldn’t eat it, they’d only eat whole things alive.

11 Feb 2019 | D.C.> Last night we wint to go get this painting we had out of storage. Sum guy was there + he had the painting on an easel + was painting on the back of it, so we aksed, "che fai?" (cuz we detourmined we was in Italy). He rattled off some long-winded explanation we din't understand in Italian so we said "no capisco" + he asked "spañolo?" + we said "si" + then he started speaking español but wasn't explaining why he was painting on the back of our painting but was just shooting the shit with some other Mexikin guys who appeared out of nowhere. Then this sophisticated lady w/a bee-hive hair-do showed up + aksed if we wanted to discuss the situation, so we thought maybe they were potential buyers so figgered we'd hear her out. She took us into this sort of mud pow-wow hut + told us to have a seat, but we saw a rat + pointed it out + then we saw another + there were rats everywhere but no 1 seemed to care. Then we saw a newt + then sum soft-shelled turtles + then it was like we were on some sorta theme tour + this was just 1 of the legs.

Feb 17—Rome
Don’t totally remember my dream, but figure if I start logging them I will… feel we are getting into a productive time. Jess + I were in a restaurant on a balcony + suddenly we see 2 lions playing in the surf. It was an amazing sight. I went to grab my camera + started to take pics but they were blurry or they jumped out of the frame. So I started shooting video, but some hippos in the foreground were standing up in my way. Within minutes there were hundreds of people on the beach to check it out. Then someone said the lion was coming back and they all started running back up to our compound. The lion came into view and there was some pregnant woman 5 feet away that was just walking. Jess was wondering if we should be moving but they were supposed to protect us in this compound so where else would we go?

Feb 18—Rome
A hurricane was coming, with some strangers putting things away and battening down hatches, w/ no urgency even tho the storm was already starting. Then I got bit by a scorpion on my finger, not sure how. I saw it and was trying to scoot it away. I went to a clinic + they made an appt for me to come back the next day. Then I saw Kevin w/ some guy, they were both drunk trying to hail a cab. He stepped into a hole + fell in the mud. The cab wouldn’t take him cuz he was drunk (after asking him some questions, which Kevin declined to answer). I asked him how much he had to drink. He said a quart of Jack, as he was drinking a martini + then threw the glass. I asked him to stop + he just kind of laughed. There was someone else there, maybe an older version of Kevin that was grizzled + old. We 3 huddled head to head + this older version said we needed to be there for each other + I said that’s why I was here, the main purpose of my trip. But I had this appt for the scorpion, even tho now I could barely see the puncture. The women at the clinic told me it was serious, that it needed attention.

the above + few others from below as adapted for Textiloma episode 12:

Feb 26—Rome
R got in an accident driving somewhere so we swtiched cars to a van. We were carrying stuff like my Peruvian pot and squashed in the back. He went around a corner really fast and I thought he was going to tip over and sure enough, we tipped. Everyone was okay, we just pushed it back up right and kept going. I said it was just basic physics. R said we were lucky, could’ve been worse, that we could have clipped someone’s handlebars or something.

April 9, 2019—Baltimore
We were in a traveling circus or some sort of band of vagabonds, but had lost our pack, so was trying to reconnect. We saw some freaks parading through a town on various forms of transportation, performing various tricks. We recognized sum of them so joined the parade. We were in search of a place to sleep for the night. A band of them we just happened to be associated with splintered off down a side street that dead-ended. We could see a larger migration on the other side of a fence, but these 2 hobo punks leading us had other things in mind. They opened the door of a car pretending they were using it to climb over the fence, but we knew they had other intentions, so started to walk away + just then the bearded owner came out of his house. He could tell that we had planned to disassociate ourself before he even emerged so let us go. We heard a commotion behind us but didn’t even want to know what was going on, didn't want to be a witness or accomplice to the crime. From the sounds of it the 2 hobo punks got the upper hand. The leader 1 was celebrating + posturing, but then i didn’t hear the other beta 1. Then the alpha hobo punk noticed the lack of reaction + started calling out the beta punk’s name, saying “wake up, wake up,” like the beta hobo punk had died. We couldn’t catch up to the larger group but came across an abandoned squat + poked our head into a room full of sleeping bodies. They were vagabonds but not our tribe, but were pretty funny + acting like they wanted us to join up with them. Then we heard what sounded like Kevin saying “bayor”. Kevin was a little kid tho, that looked like me. Our band was camping out in the open in an exposed spot near the entrance to the camp. Our bedder-½ was saying it was gonna be hard to work in this spot, to make phone calls w/ all the K-OS going on. This other guy was like “i make calls all the time, it’s no big deal.” Our bedder-½ aksed, “what do u do for a living?” The guy looked confused, “this. This is what i do.”

13 April 2019—Arlington, VA
Last nite we had a foreboding feeling + looked up at this giant mtn range + there was a massive wave pouring over the top. At 1st every 1 panicked then we realized "don't panic" + it wasn't so bad, we just sloshed around in puddles of water. There was lots more we don't remember, we just membered dat if we wrote "embodied annulment" it'd summarize the dream, even tho it had nada to do w/ el sueño, unless u think of 'anulment' as nullified in a broader sense.

17 April 2019—Arlington, VA
We put a coiled ring on sum guy that made him revert back to his old self. It broke protocol, but saved lives. We asked the guy if he wanted his ring back + he told us to keep it, that he wouldn't need it anymore. It was a coil that on the finger looked like a dozen rings.

22 April (Swann St… a 1st)
We was driving form sum mining site atop a mountain, various co-workers + acquaintances was mooching rides off us. Sum guy w/ a fruit cart slowly plowed right into the back of our Isuzu Trooper, breaking our back window. Can't remember what happened earlier in the night, but we said "the hits keep on comin’” as if this was just another in a series of mishaps. I got out + told the guy we needed to "exchange information" + he said to come back later, that he was busy + I said, "if i come back later it will be with clubs + chains." His father, who worked w/ him, scolded the guy + told him to give me a copy of his ID, which he did. Then driving down the mountain cars in front of us were doing weird maneuvers like swerving across 2 lanes of oncoming traffic to pass. We were following cars in front of us cuz we were in a foreign country + didn't know the customs. Then we took a wrong turn but we figured better safe than sorry, we pulled off the freeway + we're no longer in our Trooper but pushing a cart that had all our groceries. A few jalapeños fell off our cart so we reached over to get them + accidentally grabbed sum other peppers different from the ones we dropped. A vegetable vendor wearing a pillbox hat accused us of stealing his peppers + the entire market suddenly got quiet, as if this was the gravest insult imaginable. We explained how we'd purchased these elsewhere + they fell off our cart. The muslim vendor said this showed a lack of respect. We showed how the peppers we had were in fact a slightly diffrent color + he examined them + how sum of our peppers got mixed in w/ his, then finally he shook my hand + said "we're cool." He had a weird disc of glass in his hand, like the base of a wine glass. Realizing we were in a spanish-speaking country, we said, "en serio, lo siento, no sabia que era en un mercado." Sum street urchins started poking at my lips, imitating me, hanging off my shoulders.

23 April 2019
Was at some debaucherous party w/ all these Hollywood types w/ Mark + Brian (2 friends we've been out of touch with for over 20 years but perhaps popped in our head cuz of our resent journull transcribing). Brian was sitting across from some famous director, can't remember who. We sat next to Brian but he elbowed us + told us to sit somewhere else so we walked away saying we "don't want to ruin your image." We walked thru the party looking at all the vain ppl + thought it was stupid, so left + walked around exploring the far reaches of the compound. We started climbing up some waterfall then Mark + Brian came along + discovered the waterfall was actually an abandoned waterslide + turned the water on + came barreling down the chute knocking me along. Then we were at a live shooting of The Knights Tale (a movie we've never seen, tho we did watch GoT last night) but it was also like one of those medieval theme restaurants where you watch knights joust + fight (again, we've never been to such a place). The idea is that whenever someone was killed the person who killed them would make eye contact w/ an audience member + that person would have to take their place. So Shannyn Sossamon makes eye contact w/ me + i pretended not to notice then i was afraid to watch cuz i didn't want to participate in the movie. But she then looked at Mark + he was totally into it + ran down + jumped in the ring. Then Shannyn Sossamon said they were gonna take a break cuz she had to pee + then said "remember, keep acting 2 seconds before + after each clip so they can edit it." Otherwise they gave no instructions for the audience participation. Shannyn Sossamon came by + was ready to apologize that i didn't see her + didn't know the rules, but she was busy blabbing, really annoying, kind of fat + wearing spandex + riding boots + talking like a valley girl about how she had to piss like a racehorse. Mark came back + i asked him what it was like, he said they didn't really participate, just watched from the inside where they could see the cameras + film crew (which weren't visible from the spectator seats).

25 April 2019
We were at sum podunk dive on far away island in Mexico, we wanted to get to an even more reclusive camp on the other end but couldn't get a taxi. Chiara was there saying it was ez, but the driver she asked shrugged + said he was occupado (he was just sitting there shooting the shit). We saw this taxi outside but on closer inspection it was in a ditch burned out, and we said, "there's a drug deal gone bad." Above the meter it said Ajijic, Jalisco, Mexico so we said something to the guy standing next to it, that we used to live there + he said, "no soy de allí, soy de otra parte." We asked if he knew of a taxi and he said he could take us to 1. He had this beat up black skinny car shaped like a coffin. There was a wireframe skeleton decorated with lights under the dashboard + there was a gun pointed at his crotch, like that's how he died + the camera captured him in his position of death (like Jerri Blank's dad in Strangers With Candy) + the guy left the corpse + gun there as a souvenir. I asked if he would take us to this far away resort camp, but he said his car was no good. He was taking us thru some muddy abandoned lot. With cows, and then a herd of baboons. Finally we got to a more civilized hotel, we asked the clerk there but he said there was no taxis, but we suspected he was saying that cuz we weren't staying there. We thought we should at least tip the guy who drove us there (tho our bedder-½ said he was driving that way anyway), but when we went up to him, he became a woman cop and we only realized this as we put our arm around him/her to thank him for driving us. She smiled at me like she thought we was hitting on her. She was stocky + round + u could barely tell she was a woman. So then we were debating what to do, wether to just stay at this more civilized place.
     A few hours later we went to get a cup of coffee at this hotel, but there were no cups. We had to stand in line at the bar to ask for a cup + after serving a few people she shut down the register + took us outside, which was really annoying cuz this was the same thing she did the night before. We figured this was a deterrent from people getting free coffee, to make it really complicated. She went to some shed, then disappeared. Then we noticed there were those cheap paper cones next to a coffee machine outside so we went to make some (you had to put some in a filter). At first weak tea-like water came out so we dumped it, then dark coffee started coming out, more + more, filling the paper cone so we found a big plastic cup + filled that but the thick sludge kept coming + wasn’t getting any more dilute. We looked up atop some 2-story sort of bonsai garden mountain that was capped w/ this machine + sludge was pouring out of the seams. The coffee machine contraption looked like the ice machine in Mosquito Coast. So we climbed up to investigate, which wasn’t easy, climbing vertically up trees + rocks + crumbling hillside. As we got near the top level we could hear our bedder-½ up there w/ a few other women + she said “oh good, here’s Derek, let’s ask him.” She pointed out a squirrel that—rather than jump across a small seam between two rocks—chose to jump in the water + swim around + she thought that was indicative that something was wrong with the architecture (evidently this was part of the house we just bought). We said squirrels were known to get psychotic + act out irrationally, that it probly had rabies + they should stay away from it.

26 April 2019
2 girls were being executed, we forget for what, or who the girls were (we've been rewatching The Leftovers, so maybe they're modeled after Theroux's dotter + her saucy friend). We was meant to witness the execution, we don't know why... me + this other guy were journihilists. There were 2 executioners w/ rifles + a 5th person in the room that never said nothing, a shadowy figure. At first me + this other journihilist were off to the side at an angle where we couldn't see the girls, just the guys shooting. But we were afraid the bullets would ricochet or blood would splatter so we went behind the executioners. Both the girls were wearing bikini bottoms + T-shirts. The other journihilists was into it, excited cuz he'd never witnessed an execution before. We didn't want to see it so we was gonna close our eyes, but we could still see + the blonde girl was saying we shouldn't witness this + said "Derek can see" + got all hysterical, like she was more concerned about us seeing her executed then her being executed. The guards were very professional + said exceptions couldn't be made, that this needed to be done. But cuz she went into hysterics, now we had to wait til the temperature got back to 15° C + now it was 20° C. We turned our back + buried our head in our arms as the temperature dropped. We heard 1 gun fire. Then we heard the other gun cocked + fired. We could hear sounds like bodies slumping over, gurgling. The other journihilist was giving us the play by play of what happened, that they were shot in the stomach + suffering. We started to cry, at 1st ashamed cuz we were sposed to be professional, but then we figgered that any 1 humun wd cry + if u didn't u weren't humun.
     Then we was running an ultra-marathon w/ obstacles, thru rivers, hopping on rocks, etc. We were in the front group, but just following what the leaders did. But then we thought they were being careful, taking their time to find the right combination of rocks to jump on+ we just started wading thru the water + got in the lead. But then it got to sum confusing part w/ barricades trying to route us this way + that. We started going the wrong way, then backtracked thru a coral that led us thru security. They asked if we had any money + we laughed, told them we were running a marathon, of course we didn't have any money. They didn't speak english so somebody behind me translated in whatever language they were speaking, maybe Chinese. We were incredulous that we had to go thru all this, didn't they know we were in the middle of running a marathon? They said if we were in the middle of a marathon, then why were carrying a dumbell in our left hand. We looked down + sure enough, we were carrying a 10 lb dumbell. We joked at first, saying it was for exorcise + did a few curls for their benefit, but then said we didn't need it + were glad to give it up, thinking how much faster we could go without it. We got thru security/customs + was still in the lead, but the main pack caught up to us. We thought we could win now, but had to stop to take a pee 1st.

June 30, 2019—Swann St
(writing this down mostly to get back into the habit)
Some guy knocked at the door and said he was supposed to meet Jess to buy furniture. But I looked at the clock and it was 3:30 a.m. and said “isn’t it kind of early?” He stumbled his way in and proceeded to take off his clothes. Jess came out and I asked Jess if she told him to come over at 3:30 and she said he could come over whenever. He was lounging around in his underwear by this point, but Jess didn’t think this was so unusual. But I told him to leave, that it was too early.
     Then we were in the jetway waiting to get on the plane, they were announcing they would give 3,000 and another free ticket for anyone wanting to give up their seat and I was about to, but to college kids were already there at the counter. They started to board but we had a few things in a pile, no suitcase. I remembered I forgot something so went back to the lounge and found a bunch of stuff, like our sleeping bags still rolled up under a chair where we spent the night. Then I started to think how many times we must have forgotten things in the past and never realized it because we had forgotten them. I had to go to the bathroom and some guy came in to the stall next to me that had turets, having outbursts of profanity while peeing, then it was like he was having seizures. I was trying to be sympathetic, but wasn’t sure if it was a true condition or if he was just faking it.

24 Sept 2019
Been sort of remembering our dreams the past few nights, but not enough to articulate them. Figure maybe if we wrote them down here we might back into the habit of remembering, as it’s been a while. Maybe a seasonal thing? The last time we dreamt (June 30) we said the same thing. Before that we had a slew of dreams in April when we were transcribing our dream journals so maybe it was cuz it was on our mind.

26 Sept 2019
Last night at 3 a.m. I was busy writing in the back of a plane that was flying really low. There was an announcement over the loudspeaker to fasten our safety belts, that we were hitting turbulence, evidently the reason why we were flying so low, like a 100 feet off the ground between the clouds and the ground. Even tho the plane was ½ empty ppl were clustering near my window to look out, talking about how many straight hours it had been raining, tho it just seemed sort of overcast and drizzly to me. I went into the cockpit and our bedder—½ was in there w/ a bunch of old grandmothers. It was more like they were cooking for a holiday dinner than flying a plane. The phone rang + Jess answered. The grandmothers were squabbling, asking her who it was, but Jess was acting all casual, not talking, nibbling on this + that while flipping the phone between her shoulders (back when we had those big phones you could cradle in your shoulder). I was also expecting a call, but Jess wouldn’t let anyone in on who she was talking to, just mumbling stuff here + there about the weather, how we were about to break the record for how many straight hours it had been raining.

17 Oct 2019
We wint to Treasure Island w/ our brudder Chaulky. While we waited for the subway back (in diffrent stations, even tho we was going back to the same place—his pad in L.A.) we d-sided to run back for exorcise. But 1st we had to get out of the sprawling Disney complex... we rode sum of the rides backwords, like the Haunted House so we saw all the props from a diffrent persepetive, on the return trip, like riding a chairlift down + u can see all the ppl on the way up, on the ride, but we too cd see all the elaborately fabricated sets but sumtimes we cd see b-hind the scene d-tails of their construction cuz they weren't concerned about what we cd see from our perspective cuz most folk don't ride the rides backwoods. We maid it thru the Haunted House + a few other rides in riverse + then was just mustering to navigate the back hallwaze, sumping folks normally ain't inklined to do xcept service personnel. During all this we was trying to text Chaulky to let 'em know we was "gonna run back" but wasn't getting no service or it wd go all haywire + then he wasn't in our address book + then when we finally did find hym the entire font set of the keybored + commands on the phone was all in sum fancy curly cursive font that was impossible to read, so we couldn't even tell what we was texting + we were on these rides backwords so hard to see or do nothing b-sides clutch the phone w/ both hands so we din't drop her. We was also lugging a painting that Chaulky gave us + sum other stray stuff (that we stuffed in a pillowcase) we had to keep track of. At sum point along the way we crossed paths w/ Chaulky + aksed if he cd take the painting back for us cuz we d-sided to run back + he seamed annoyed + said no, that he had to get back to pack for the airport, witch seemed a lame xcuse but we din't push the isshoe, figgered we cd run w/ the painting balanced on our head, was up for the challenge. We wanted to see if we cd beat Chaulky, him on public transport wile we was a'running, if we cd manage to even get out of Disneyland! Finally we emurged from the complex + started to run + realized we din't have the painting. We retraced our footsteps (lugging the pillowcase like Santa Claws) trying to find the door we came out of, wich off course wouldn't be marked cuz exits usually ain't marked from the outside + it wasn't a way folks normally wd go. We opened sum doors that led to bathrooms or service areas or down stairs we din't member coming up, all leading nowhere + then we saw a kid waiting for his mom + when she emurged out of a door we aksed if she just came out of Treasure Island + she said no, that it was Honey Island. We tried to aks Disney personnel where it was but they'd guide us to the entrance to Treasure Island + we had to x-plane we needed to know where the exit was, where we came out of, wich confused them, cuz why wd inny 1 wanna know where the exit was? Then we aksed a security guard where the exit to Pleasure Island was + they said they din't have such a ride + we said, oops, Freudian slip, we meant TReasure island. It was a sprawling complex w/ lot of doorways + passedges + weird side events going on, like at 1 point we got stuck in a stampede of old mentally disabled folks running w/ beer + cheese in their hands, sum sorta race they was halving + we happened to be rite in the way. We was searching + searchengin but couldn't find no exit door thru wich we axidentally left the painting our brudder Chaulky gave us.

18 Oct 2019
I was in a band that was about to play our first concert. We were hanging out in a room below the stage and then it was time to go on, as I was going up the stairs I realized I didn’t know how to play any of the songs, I never bothered to rehearse anything, not even the couple songs I wrote. I figured I could wing it, if I put enough effects on my guitar, then realized I forgot the FX pedals. I thought this was something you just showed up for, like going to a concert as a spectator. I got nervous thinking without the FX ppl would know I didn’t the songs at all, that I couldn’t even pretend to play quietly in the background. I didn’t want to chicken out and disappoint my new band, but was starting to panic. Then I realized I didn’t even bring my guitar so had a good excuse.

22 Oct 2019
We were in a camp of sum sort + this girl asked me to sniff a mushroom + we said it smelled like play dough + that she could sell that smell + make money. I proceeded to described in detail the crayon drawing on the cover of the play dough container, how i couldn’t forget it or the smell. Then this guy was supposed to shoot a bear (all planned) but he missed or the gun failed + the, bear came toward us + sum kids that took cover + we just stood our ground + yelled at it + the bear went away. Then the guy, evidently the bear trainer, shot it anyway, with a pistol since his rifle broke. He ordered the bear to submit while he took the bear in a headlock + shot it point blank. When the dust cleared, the bear was a buffalo.

24 Oct 2019
We were going to the airport on a skateboard, zooming thru hallways with laminated wood floors, bashing thru swinging doors. Then we ran into Zeke Zagar who was looking for the olympics competition, which we had just passed so we took him there, skating thru the same hallways, but we didn’t know specifically where the half-pipe was. We could see it down below, but had had to climb down this cliff to get to it. As we were climbing down this whole section of rock fall off + we were falling but then we took control + turned it into sort of flying. Now we were down in this valley and needed to climb back up, and we had confidence cuz now we knew we could do anything so were looking for some heinous route to climb. Some climbers asked us if we had taken 30 ppl climbing before, as if this was a # of times you needed to do it before you were qualified to lead. We commented about people were never so nosey in our day then we got into a discussion about how you have to practice just enough, but not too much, it’s all about timing, reaching the pinnacle at the time of the performance, cuz if you practice too much you’ll be uninspired. Then we got to thinking was Nadia Comoneci really deserving of 7 perfect 10s, or were the judges paid off?

8 Nov 2019
We was at our grandmars last nite typing on our laptop when she just started coming apart rite below our fingertips, the keys coming unhinged + even the electronics below all loose + busted w/ wires + sparks bursting out (tho we was still able to type + uplode this verry blog post, tho hadn't linked her up yet). We toll our grandmar dat this startid happening since we got hear the noche before (as if to imply we was sabotaged by a relative in the household), but din't want to blame no body in pertickler. Then we notissed sum ants coming from bajo el laptop + when we lifted her up there was zillions of 'em, streamin' up the mesa. We mustered to kill sum near the computer but gave up cuz there was just weigh too menny. We followed the line of 'em down to the flor + discovered they was carrying the queen, in a orchid-pod sorta cuntraption. "Whoa," we said, "sumping perty despirate must of happend dat they'd bee exposing the Queen comme ça." As we was stairing at the Queen in awe our brother casually walked over + stepped on her + we shrugged + said, "well, guess dat's the best weigh of getting rid of a buttload of ants all at once."

21 Nov 2019 [the dream where Ms. Ann Thrope 1st appeared to us]
We had a cyborg wife that apparently we’d been married to for a while, but had never had sex with. She was the widow of our brother, so we’re obliged to marry her, in the levirate tradition. We looked sort of like Gwenneth Paltrow, but very pale and blonde, so pale that her skin was translucent and you could see cubes of jello in her skin. I told her she had beautiful skin and touched her. She took my hand and put it on her breast and then we started to kiss and that’s when I realized we’d been married all this time but never had sex, even though I was entitled to, and perhaps depriving her of the pleasure so we started fooling around. When I got down there we discovered she was wet cuz she was bleeding, she was having her period, so we didn’t need protection. She was straddling me but then I looked up and we were in the waiting area of a doctor’s office and the receptionist was looking down on us and calling security. So we left and were wandering around, trying to find a place to have sex in public. Then I said “hey, I got an idea, why don’t we have sex in our bedroom?” Because we had a house nearby, but for some reason it just wasn’t the same, it had to be in public.

10 Dec 2019
Sitting on the beach when these 2 humpback whales beached themselves right in front of us. I was trying to take a photo but my phone wasn’t working then some guy walked up and started touching the whales and I was like “seriously”? And got into an argument with him and ended up not appreciating the whales, who by then turned around and fled cuz so many people were coming up to touch them and take selfies.

[in 2020 we already logged dreams from 4-Jan, 10-Jan (in Florida), 31-Mar, 2-April + 7-April but didn't log these:]

17 Feb 2020
I was at a hotel-like apartment making music, recording from a walkman w/ 2 cords, trying to figure out transferring old technology to new. Thought I heard a shaking + Jess yelling “Derek”. I looked thru the peephole + she was out there sitting on the steps (in the dream).

1 Mar 2020, DC
I was standing at the counter at some bank to deposit a few hundred bucks in cash + had to watch some powerpoint thing and when it was over they told us to go stand back in line + all these people had formed a line cutting in front of us not understanding that we had already been up to the front then when we finally got thru this total random procedure this soft-spoken women asked (in a really random passive-aggressive way) if we didn’t mind they were asking people to use the tellers + then conduct a survey after + we were wondering why we didn’t use the teller to begin so we said okay but the teller was totally random + confusing, charged us a $50 cash transaction fee + then gave us a shitload of change, more then fit in our pocket. And now we had to go back into the bank to give them our feedback + we couldn’t find it cuz it was in some weird mall and there was free coffee and the one labeled “corona virus” was most popular + we were annoyed we had to go back into the bank + probably wait in line all over but at least we could give them our feedback.

2 Mar 2020, DC> Getting on a plane, the lower deck was for "ghost-writers + middle-men, go-betweens like Keyser Söze".

... + that brings us up to date. From here forward, we'll log our dreams straight into The Daily Noose. Waking reality no diffrent then our dream state.

[UPDATE: complete 2020 dream log]

728 <(current)> 730> 4 books that shouldn't be books + a new guitar to shake a seeing-eye dog we saw shaking
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