1/20/2022> 8 squash + green ¢hili quiche w/ broiled pot8atos + cicadas (ye5, we 5till have ∫um on ice) + wat¢hed Passing (★★★), intresting but a bit 5low

1/21> 8 black bean tac0s + wat¢hed The Lost Daughter (★★★★) + rewat¢hd Roma (★★★★★)... can personally rel8, when we lived in Mexico a5 a toddler we had a made

1/22> 8 arrabiata pasta + re-wat¢hd Rear Window (★★★★)(for 3rd ⊕ 4th time) + Georgetown (★★★)... strange there'5 thi5 whole ¢ulture of ppl in D.C. th@ we'R s0 far-removed from

1/23> maid the mi5take of che¢king th 5tats on th album we relea5ed la5t month onely 2 dis¢over no 1 ha5 even li5tened 2 it, not even just 2 sample it (th blip on th day we released wa5 probly just u5 te5ting th link5)

... thi5 = nothing nu, bin th 5tory of R life (C post #619 on failure... (cumplete w/ mixtape)), we've failed @ everything weve ever done, in th public eye NEway (not in R one) > we've ju5t learnd 2 live w/ it + appreci8 th@ we have th luckshorey 2 keep doing waht we do + keep failing > waht the above data tells u5 tho = it ain't nessyssorily th@ ppl don't «like» Sound Furies, but it'5 just th@ no 1 even bothers 2 li5ten in th 1st place, so R failure preseeds us > if ppl listend 2 it + din't buy it ⊕ say N-E-thing we cd @ least assume it wa5 «bad» ⊕ not every1s cup of T, but feels more ≈ a tree falling in a 4est w/ no 1 around 2 here it

> 4 dinner we 8 squa5h + green chili qui¢he w/ pot8os + broccoli + watched Smithereens (★★) wich was pertty bad but worth it 2 C Richard Hell + gritty footage of NYC in th early 80s > then wat¢hed a documentary about Joan Didion (The Center Will Not Hold)(★★★★) , a fascin8ing figure 4 sure + we can especially rel8 2 th NYC/California dichotomy

1/24> 5till dwelling on failure + th meaning of Ǝxistence in thi5 modurn world... we (as Cal A Mari) got on twitter 6 months ag0 thinking perhaps Calamari's failure wa5 b/c no 1 knew of its Ǝxistence b/c we didn't partake in NE «social media», but it hasn't maid a lick of diffrence, it only exacerb8s th i55ues, makes us more D-pressed + di5tracted > weed under5tand if ppl said «your mu5ic ain't R thing, but bravo, we can appreci8 the effort U put in2 it» but we don't even get th@, not even from so-called friends > we can only pre5ume folks R so super-satur8ed w/ all th noize of every1 5houting @ once th@ no 1 (out of 888, + another 8800+ that R bedder-½ (th Sound ƒuries vox) retweeted it 2) even clicks thru 2 li5ten (@ least we tell our5elves this 2 feel bedder), but even 5till, when we tweeted abt it5 release hardly NE 1 even «liked» th fact (in theory, even if they didnt listen 2 NE of th tracks) th@ we 5pent th bedder part of last year making thi5 album, whereas if we postid a GIF of a cat we'd probly get 100s of ♥s

>so we qwit > thi5 ain't th 1st time we qwit twitter, back in 2010 or so we quit all so¢ial media > u mite a5k rathr than qwit twitter Y not log-in 2 just post upd8s + not read th feed? u5e it az free adverti5ing? we already feel cheap + complicit just B-ing on twitter the5e past 6 months but ju5t u5ing it az a billbored wd make us feel even wor5e > it's ju5t not in R anonymous posthumun n8ure 2 u5e it az a 1-way 5treet, we ¢are 2 mu¢h waht othr ppl think + feel if ∫um 1 follows u5 we shd follow 'eM back + Ngage + then we get suckd in2 th toxic circle jerk, u5ing twittr az a means 2 valid8 (witch in th end only makes u feel mor shitty), getting a-noyed @ waht B-comes popular + th meaningful things th@ go unnoticed, how it promotes thi5 addictive morefiend drip culture of U5 vs. them, celebrities/«ta5temakers» vs. fans + th feeds R far from democratic (not 2 mention there seams 2 B mor + mor ads mixd in) > there'5 thi5 Xpectancy 2 entertain w/ viral wit + your communications B-come in4med by waht gets more ♥s, not by waht comes true 2 yr one voice > az we probly 5said b4, in a way we'R glad no 1 ♥s NE of R stuff b/c if they did 4 eggsample ♥ a certain 5ong ⊕ b∞k then weed feel cumpelled 2 make mor in th@ vein

> quitting twitter won't solve R problems, but we won't B reminded of R failures + we won't tailor R output ba5ed on wah't ppl «like» > we had thi5 problem long B4 twitter... no 1 listened 2 ⊕ gave us feedback on th tapes we put out in th late 80s + gave away 2 friends + family > when we gave R brother (w/ 5ame ta5te in music) a cassette of Rs not only did he not say N-E-thing but a year later we discovered th@ he'd u5ed it a5 a blank tape 2 put other mu5ic on it + th@ left a big 5car on R eg0 > U'd think we wd of gotten th hint back then (we did, hence Y we sold all our instruments + didn't make music again until 30 yrs l8r) > ∫umtimes we wondr waht's th point of N-E-thing, Y we even bother 2 release ⊕ publish things as we've gotten this 5ame re5ult from virtualE everything we've ever done (not a single review of R la5t 3 b∞ks)... wa5n't thi5 Einstein's defintion of insanity? doing th 5ame thing over + over + Xpecting a diffrent result? we've probly even u5ed th@ quote b4

> N-E-way, ∀ll we can do is keep failing bedder + stay tru to waht we do + keep doing it not caring waht othr ppl think

... P.S. az we'R abt 2 po5t thi5, got news of thi5 ni¢e review of Tributaries by Beach Sloth , so perhaps there'5 ∫um lite @ th end of th tunnel...